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State of my life, plans for the future

I'm at a weird point right now. My dad came to help me move about a week ago. He treated me super well, talked with me about everything I was struggling with, and actually listened and showed that all he cared about was my happiness. He took me everywhere I wanted to go, got us a nice place to stay for the night that we spent in a hotel between leases, and bought me everything I needed for my apartment, even beyond what I originally had in mind. He's paying for this beautiful apartment and all of my classes, and trying to get me back in touch with my mom and... It's just... I'm truly blessed to have him as my father, if he can forgive me even after I was such an insufferable brat for so long. I don't know where I'd be without him. Anyways, I've decided I will actually try talking with my mom again (at Dad's request), on the condition that she stays sober for an entire week before talking with me. I don't like talking with drunks, and...
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Happy For Once

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I'm starting to feel like all of my self-hate is caused by me caring too much about what people think of me. People have told me this in the past, and they're right. Sort-of. There are some things I really care about as part of my affirmation, but I dont want to be gross. That said, I care if I pass. I care whether or not I've been accepted as a girl, and I don't want to be mistaken for some sort of a drag queen or drag enthusiast; I honestly think the whole thing is gross and a detriment to trans acceptance overall. Beyond that, I'm honestly just happy that I pass for the most part. It drives me insane to know I'll never totally be female; I will always have a male upbringing, I will always be scarred with dysphoria and rejection, and I'll never be able to carry a child without an excessive risk of complications, but the little things really do count when it comes to progress. I think this is the first time in a while that I've been able to be h...
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Hiya :3

Hey everyone, If I can be completely honest, I'm still not entirely sure what I want to do with this blog yet. There are some details of my life that I feel like I want to keep out of the public eye, so for now they'll stay that way; however, if it gets to a point where I feel like it's to everyone's benefit to share, I'll make an entire post explaining it. What I will say right now is that I'm a girl dealing with a mixture of depression and an inferiority complex. This gives me a bit of anxiety about going out in public and makes life a bit overwhelming. I just don't care anymore tbh. I need a place to speak and make sure I'm not going crazy. -Charlotte
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